An Open Letter To The Royal Baby

FREE IMAGES Welcome to the world, George Alexander Louis!

So I know that you're only a few days old, but I'm pretty sure you've already had more excitement than many people have over the course of their entire lifetime. I mean, the whole universe was on pins and needles waiting for you to make your entrance into the world. We all cheered when your parents showed you off to the world for the first time. After all, you're a famous little prince. I'm pretty sure you set some sort of record for being the youngest person ever to trend on Twitter. Your parents' wedding was a pretty big event. Oh, and did I mention that you're third in line to the British throne? Yes, what an exciting world you've been born into.

Overwhelmed yet? I know. It's a lot to take in all at once. The world is a big place, full of wonder, intrigue and mystery, and it's all too easy to feel unprepared for it all. There just never seems to be enough time for it all, but don't worry, Little Prince -- I'm not here to discourage you. No, no. That's not my intention at all. In fact, I'm here to help you, as much as a commoner like myself can help a future heir. Right now, I'm sure you're sound asleep in your royal crib or being held by your royal uncle (heads up: Harry is going to be one AWESOME uncle...). Life may be rather quiet for the moment. But as you begin taking those first unsure steps in your journey, make sure you keep these three life lessons in mind...

Your parents are (almost) always right
Even though your parents are a Duke and Duchess and hip and cool to the rest of the world, they're probably just mom and dad to you. And let's face it, mom and dad can be embarrassing, even if you are a prince. They may do things or say things that make you want to hide under your crown and never come out again. They may tell the world embarrassing stories about your childhood. But through it all, just remember one thing: They love you. More than you'll probably ever know. And whether you want to admit it or not, they're usually right, so make sure you listen to them. They know what they're talking about, and they've got your best interest at heart.

Life can get messy -- and you'll no doubt make mistakes along the way
Yes, life is rich, but it can also be messy. And it is messy sometimes. That's just a consequence of living, and it's something you simply can't avoid. Another thing you won't be able to avoid? Making mistakes. It's just a fact of life. But don't be afraid because you won't be along. Everyone makes mistakes, whether they are brave enough to open up to them or not. If you think about it, there's a beauty to opening up and owning those mistakes, in showing the world your flaws. It shows we're all human and in this crazy journey together. Isn't that a comforting thought?

With great power comes great responsibility
OK, so I know I'm stealing this one from the amazing Spider-man, but it applies, especially to you. I know your parents will bring you up right, so make sure you go forth in this world and do good work. Love with all your soul. Hope with all your heart. Help with everything you are. You can't go wrong if you live life by that philosophy. You have the power to make a lasting difference in our world. Don't forget to always use your powers for good.

I look forward to watching you grow up. Life can be one wild ride sometimes, but if you remember to fasten your seat belt, it promises to also be a fun one. Here's to lots of exciting adventures ahead of you!! xoxo

On Cory Monteith's death: 4 things I've learned about addiction

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More than a week has passed since the sudden and untimely death of Glee star Cory Monteith. I've been debating how I wanted to -- or even if I wanted to -- address his death on So About What I Said. As more and more information comes to the surface, it seems as though everyone has an opinion, and I wondered if I could even add anything worthwhile to the already crowded conversation.

But then I realized the important value of speaking up. Because where taboo topics like these are concerned, not being a voice in the conversation is far worse than keeping things to yourself. And besides, addiction is something that hits very close to home for me. I've seen it take over loved ones, and unfortunately, have seen the heartbreaking wreckage it leaves in its wake. For better or for worse -- some days, I'm not sure which one -- addiction has touched me and changed me, just like it's touched and changed millions of people's lives around the world. So in the spirit of sharing, here are four things I've learned about addiction...

Addiction is an evil beast
Addiction is insidious. It sneaks up on you, and sometimes, you don't even see it coming. And, it has this tricky little habit of disguising itself as something beautiful, something you need -- maybe even something innocent. It lures you in and makes you believe that it's something you can't live without. Until, well, you really can't live without it. It's got a mind of its own. It knows all your weaknesses and pounces on them every chance it gets. It knows all the right words to say and makes sure those are the only words you actually listen to.

Addiction not only affects you...it affects everyone around you
This is the lesson I've learned all too well over the years. Addiction is a family disease, one made up of sleepless nights, pleas and lots of worrying. Because addiction is like a pebble thrown into the sea: The ripple effect can be felt for miles as addiction tries to get its tentacles around everyone and everything it possibly can. You wonder how you all got to this point. You wonder what the future will hold. And sometimes, you're even scared of the future. You'd do anything in your power to help your loved one, but eventually, you realize...

Addiction needs boundaries
You can't live for someone else. You can't let someone else's addiction control your life. You need to establish some firm boundaries -- and stick to them. It's so important to take care of yourself. This can be the most difficult thing in the world to do. Trust me, it's so easy to become enmeshed in someone else's disease, especially if you think you can solve all their problems, but that's just it. Ultimately, it's not your problem. It's not your disease. Of course, you can be there for support, but at the end of the day, the road to recovery has to be walked by the person facing the addiction.

Addiction doesn't have to mean a death sentence
There is help out there. Lots of it, actually. And unlike years ago, there is less of a stigma associated with addiction these days. There's no shame in admitting you need help. In fact, asking for help shows far more strength than trying to battle it all on your own. Taking the first step is painful, but it's necessary.

If you've been affected by addiction, friends, what other lessons would you add to the list? What helped you? And if you're still in the throes of it, whether you're suffering or know someone who is, my heart is with you. xoxo

[Photos via We Heart It]

First Look: The royal baby is here!

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These photos have been making the Internet rounds since William and Kate left the hospital yesterday, but I couldn't resist sharing such a little bundle of joy. Isn't the little prince adorable? That face! Those cheeks! Those hands! Congrats, William and Kate! xoxo

P.S. I love how William and Kate are beaming. They're going to be such fantastic parents!! :)

[Photos via Huffington Post, PEOPLE and HELLO]

Family Photos: More on Ms. Bear

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Yesterday, I began telling the tale of how my mother became known as Ms. Bear. And then I realized something: With a moniker like Ms. Bear, my mom couldn't help but pass down some of her strong, fierce traits to me.

After all, this is what has made me reach for so many things in life. In high school, I was a member of the National Honor Society, and in college, I was editor-in-chief of my school newspaper. I don't know if I would have had the confidence to push myself if my mother hadn't been there, cheering me on and always willing to give me a reality check if I ever got down on myself. Yes, I soon discovered my mother's secret superpower lied in her ability to teach me about life as I was in the midst of living it. She's sneaky like that. Mothers aren't just people who shake a stern fist when you track clumps of mud on the porcelain-white living room carpet. And they're not just people who lecture until their face turns a blazing red when you leave heaps of dirty clothes piled in your room. They shape who you are and they must get you ready to go out into that big world, ready to be the person you're meant to become.

And that's why to Janelle and me, she'll always be Ms. Bear. Not because she's a towering, aggressive creature. To us, she represents a larger-than-life figure, a protector who takes care of her baby cubs. When my father died, I know she not only lost her husband but her soul mate. Instead of retreating into despair, she continued to take care of us -- comforting us, hugging us, being our anchor during the storm of grief. I wish all mothers knew how important they are to their children, especially their daughters. We know you're always watching over us like a mother bear watches over her cubs.

I tell my mother, "I'm 31. I can take care of myself.” But in her sneaky, mother know-how, she's able to see right past that. Because the truth is, I wouldn't be who I am without my mother's guiding hand and loving heart, wrapping me in security and peace. Every night before I go to bed, I thank my mom for everything, for all the physical help she's given me that day. She says it's not necessary, but I never want her to forget how much I appreciate her. And as I get older, I know the "Thanks, Mom” is about so much more than the physical assistance. Maybe that's the beauty of it right there. Call me an idealist, but I like to think mothers pass down the best aspects of their personality to their cubs. So all you cubs, go hug your Mama Bear today. She deserves it. xoxo

Family Photos: Meet Ms. Bear (Part One)

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Everybody has a nickname for their mother. Maybe they're not comfortable with the traditional Mom label. Case in point: In one of my favorite movies Mermaids, Winona Ryder's character calls her mother Mrs. Flax. She takes the professional-relationship route.

My sister, Janelle, and I call our mother Ms. Bear. She's always been Ms. Bear. I'm not even sure when the nickname came into existence. I suppose it morphed out of the childhood image of my mother rising from her bed chambers. Every morning since I was 10 years old, the scene played out the same way. I'd hear a faint creak of a bed, hear loud footsteps on the carpet (my mother wears a size 12 shoe, of course!) and see the bedroom door fling open. And out would step Ms. Bear. Her hair standing up in all directions like Bozo. One sock hiked up to her knee cap, the other dangling from her toes. And that yawn -- a thunderous call in the wild resembling, you guessed it, a bear. It practically shook the whole house. But Ms. Bear was merely making her presence known. A trailblazer pounding through the forest of life. So many times, we vow that we'll be different from our mother. We won't make the same mistakes she did. But I can't help but wonder: Can we ever really escape becoming our mothers? Is it such a bad thing to become the next generation of June Cleavers or Mrs. Flaxes?

Growing up, Ms. Bear opened a bright, sparkling world to me -- a world in which women could be traditional and nontraditional. They could wear the apron in the kitchen and still be strong, independent feminists. All at the same time. She was a stay-at-home mom for most of my childhood, one of those mothers who wholeheartedly threw herself into motherhood. Sometimes I think she was happiest when my sister and I were hanging on her, clamoring for her love and attention.

The summers turned into our designated Mother/Daughter Time. Living mere blocks from my father's electronics shop at the local university, we pounded the pavement on a sweltering day, and after we visited him and marveled at the newest gadget he was fixing; she took us to the lagoon so we could sit under the weeping willows and feed the ducks. Other weeks, she took us to the library, and I remember immersing myself in the stacks of the children's department. In those times, I wasn't disabled. Or confined to a wheelchair. I was just Melissa -- a little redhead reading Curious George and giggling.

Ms. Bear taught me how to become a raging independent woman when we were forced to leave that innocent bubble and enter the scary medical world of Chicago. I'd had 26 surgeries by the time I was 16, and would typically be put in an Ilizarov, a contraption of pins inserted into the bone that would slowly release the muscles and straighten my legs and feet. We were one of the first families allowed to go home with the Ilizarov. It was standard procedure back then for patients to stay in the hospital for four months for treatment. "My daughter will not be laying in a hospital bed for four months,” my mother informed the doctors in her classic matter-of-fact tone. So each day at home, she became my nurse. Laying out a bottle of rubbing alcohol that reeked through the house, setting aside a pile of sterile gauze and slapping on a pair of gloves, she went to work like a pro -- meticulously cleaning every one of some 40 pins on the Ilizarov. You see, my mom planted the seed in me at a very young age that I could do anything I wanted and that I should never let my disability define me. I think this is what made me reach for so many things in life.

(Make sure to check back tomorrow for Part Two... xoxo)

Family Photos: More New York love

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A few more photos from my mom's big trip to the Big Apple to brighten your Monday. :)

P.S. A new Love Lounge is coming up soon!

Family Photos: What I learned in New York City

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New York! The Big Apple! Broadway! Whatever you think of when you think New York City, it is bound to have a little excitement associated with it, right? Well, I just got back from a weekend in Manhattan and I learned something there. Here's the story...

I left on Friday to go spend the weekend with my niece Mona, who lives on the Upper West Side. I was ready for some frolicking and fun. Instead, what I got was warm (and not because of the 100-degree heat!) and cozy family time! Who would have thought?

You see, along with Mona, we were overflowing with family that hadn’t seen one another for a while, certainly not since the death of my father, who was truly the patriarch of the family. It turned out that my sister Elaine, nephews John and Mike, along with Mike’s wife Jade, nephew David, wife Belinda, their two sons and my niece Jennifer and her partner Rosita were all there! Everyone was so excited to see one another. We would be looking around at the museum, and we would just stop and start trading stories. We had long lunches and dinners where the focus was on each other and not the food. We commiserated with one another over the sweltering heat! We sat around Mona’s small apartment and watched the newest generation play, and we played right along with them. We teased Mona ceaselessly about her obsessive scheduling of vacations, but in the end, we appreciated having things planned out for us. One morning, when I was out taking pictures for Melissa’s blog, I came back and Mona had a lovely plate of breakfast made for me. Over lunch the last day, I found myself with my camera out, showing my nephew's son the pictures from the weekend and having him tell me who everyone was. And, you know what? He did! I can honestly say that it was not the hubbub of the city that I am going to carry with me; it is the feeling that comes from being with family, and for that, I am very grateful!

During the few quiet times we had, and even during the loud ones, I often found myself thinking about my dad. It'a only been four months since his death, and I couldn't help but think, “Look, Dad. Look at what you created -- your family misses you terribly, but we will go on and live good lives, stay in contact and make you proud!”

So, next time you take a vacation, remember that what you think will happen might not be what really does happen in the end. Maybe what happens will be even better than you ever dreamed!

My Father's Suicide: 5 questions I'd ask him

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After March, the summer months have always been pretty emotional since my father died. I've seen some 10 Father's Days come and go in June, and 10 of his birthdays have passed every July. Sometimes I feel like those two months are like giant red bulls eyes on the calendar of my life, so every year I try to brace myself for them. Well, brace myself as best as I can, I suppose. Because let's be honest: These days are never as easy as we'd like them to be. We can't just wave a magic wand and have them magically disappear. We have to face them, whether we want to or not.

This year, I've been thinking more about what our life would be like if my father was still alive. Part of me knows that it's sort of futile to let my mind wander there, sure, but another part of me just seems to drift there naturally. Especially on Father's Day, I'd see all these women with their fathers, and it made me think: What are they talking about? Is the father imparting lots of fatherly wisdom? Is the daughter fully appreciating what is happening right before her very eyes? What would I do if I were somehow in that position again? I'm not quite sure, but there are five questions I'd definitely ask him...

Did you really think we'd be better off without you here?
That's what he hinted at in his suicide note (I've only been able to read the suicide note a few times...), and this is one of the biggest issues I've wrestled with over the last decade. It's hard to wrap your head around the fact that your own father would consciously choose to leave you, that he'd actually want to leave his family behind.

Do you miss us?
Wherever he is, I often wonder if my father thinks of us or misses us. Is he watching over us? I like to think that he does miss us -- and maybe even regrets the choice he made. My father was such a family man, so it's hard for me to imagine him not missing us. As angry as I've been with him, I've always missed him deep down.

Why didn't you try...at least a little longer?
OK, this one may reflect my anger just a bit, but it's those "Why" questions of grief that linger the longest. Why couldn't he hold on awhile longer? Why didn't he tell us he was feeling so desperate? We would have dealt with it together, facing whatever challenges were head. Why...why...why?

What life and love advice would you give me?
The longer he's gone, the more I realize that there are so many things I won't be able to get my father's advice on. I won't be able to ask him for career advice. I won't be able to ask him what he thinks of potential Mr. Melissa Blakes. I won't even be able to roll my eyes at all that fatherly advice I'm sure he'd give me. It all leaves me feeling, well, a bit cheated. Those are experiences I was counting on having, and now I won't. My heart can't help but feel a bit empty.

Are you proud of me?
I don't care what people say: No matter how old you are, you'll always want your parents to be proud of you. To some degree, you'll always want their approval, that metaphorical gold star, if you will. I often wonder if my father would have read my blog and what he would have thought of my work. Would he like it? I miss having his positive, encouraging presence in my life.

As more time goes by, more questions will no doubt pop up, and although I'll never be able to definitively answer them, maybe just giving voice to them is therapy enough for now. At least some part of me will be able to work through them just by setting them free. After all, I'm sure of one thing: Holding all those emotions in and suppressing them is entirely unhealthy. I know I don't want that. And neither would my father. xoxo

[Photos via Le Love and We Heart It]

Family Photos: My Carefree "Bachelorette" Weekend 2013

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Well, that was my tweet from last Friday. As I mentioned earlier, my mom was away in the big city over the weekend. And, as the classic saying goes, "when the cat's away, the mice will play." So! I suppose I just need to be honest and come clean, friends: I had a wild, wild weekend. I know, it's quite hard to believe. After all, I'm a good girl, remember? But, it's true -- something just took over me this weekend. I let my hair down. I throw all caution to the wind. I even...drank Diet Coke at 10 p.m. Sheer madness, I know. As always, in the name of full disclosure, here's the full photo record of my shenanigans (see, I have become a rebel...I use words like "shenanigans")...

First meal of Carefree Bachelorette Weekend 2013!!! Notice how the TV remote is poised and ready...

Quality Netflix and DVR time, anyone...?

Interesting dinner choice tonight...cereal, fruit and shredded cheese! And of course, some Reese's pieces for dessert...

Laundry time! One of the only responsible things I did this weekend...

Harry really misses his mom, and Stella loves her lazy Sundays...

Dinner is served...

Weekend reading, anyone...?

Diet Coke at 10 p.m.? I am such a bad girl when left to my own devices...

See what I mean, friends? The whole weekend was pure debauchery. I'm surprised I made it out alive! Have you ever had a "lost weekend" like this? Maybe we all need a weekend like this every once in awhile...? xoxo

Sneak Peek: My mom's Big Apple adventure

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Exciting news, friends: My mom took a bite out of the Big Apple this past weekend. As she says, it was "a whirlwind" couple of days, and she's got the photos to prove it. Well, I twisted her arm into sharing all the details of her adventure -- actually, it didn't take much coaxing. I can't wait for her to share all the photos, along with fun stories, on Thursday, but in the meantime, aren't these photos of the Statue of Liberty beautiful? I keep telling my mom that she should become a photographer, but she never listens to me... xoxo

P.S. Family Photos of how I spent my weekend are coming up soon! :)

Happy Fourth of July: 10 patriotic Pinterest finds

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American flag

Classic sparklers

Flag fruit pizza

Outdoor table setting

Red, white and blue nails

Striped wooden spoons

All-American style

Patriotic roses

Layered drink

Chalkboard print (from Etsy shop j&paper)

Have a good day, friends! Here's to family, relaxing and LOTS of good food! xoxo